Cross Your Heart and Say You've Never a Given Up
by queenlocksley
Summary: Based off of spoilers that Robin has to leave town for a curse, but a few things have changed.
1. Chapter 1

[A/N: okay so this is based off of the spoiler that Robin will be leaving Storybrooke, and I didn't want to make it a multi-chapter but I had to because it just became sooo long. Enjoy part 1]

Regina struggles to breath, having grown unaccustomed to wearing corsets. Her fingers fight with the velvet of her gown, tearing the fabric along the seams, her chest heaving forward with a gasp of breath as she drags a finger through the strings tying up her corset; loosening its lethal lace. The sun is rising in the east, it breaks through the leaves of the trees, causing her to flinch away, blink her eyes as beautiful bright rays of golden sunlight pierce her irises.

Regina finds shelter in her vault where she no longer feels the need to maintain herself for the sake of public decency and thrusts the rest of her gown off of her, kicking it to the side, catching glimpse of her reflection in the mirror./emshe thinks staring at a woman she knows is her but does not look like it. Not with those sharp dark eyes, nearly black, and lips hiding teeth razor sharp, pursed and ready to make you bleed the color of her lips.

Her hair is tousled on top of her head in a bun that reminds her of something the bride of Frankenstein would pull off better. Must have been in a hurry, Regina jokes with herself as she shrugs out of her corset and begins to remove the jeweled pins in her ebony tresses. To do a hair job this poorly. A creak echoes off the stony corridors of the stone vault chambers and Regina turns her head, a gasp escaping her lips as she makes a futile attempt to cover herself with her hands.

"I thought I'd find you here," an all too familiar voice responds and the clompy foot steps of her outlaw travel to her ears. "At ease, love," he chuckles in view, seeing her. "I'm afraid the time to try and remain chaste, and hidden is gone," Regina whaps his shoulder, eliciting another low laugh from him, but she will have none of it, moving her hands to shield her face and whipping herself around so he has a nice view of her back (and ass) at that.

"Robin, go! I don't want you to see me like this," Regina orders into her hands not peeling them away from her face.

"See you like what?" Robin purrs innocently, closing the gap between them as his hands wrap around her, resting on her hipbones and his teeth grate against her shoulder, nipping and sucking at certain spots. "Stunning in every way?" He sucks her pulse point, sending chills down her spine and she can feel his smirk against her skin. "Because m'lady I do recall seeing you much like this repeatedly the last time I was in your vault-"

Enough of this. "My vault is not going to become some love shack!" Regina protests, dropping her hands to scold him, smack the back of his head. "And second," she returns her gaze to stare reflection dead in the eye. "I don't want you to see me like this, in some sort of 'evil queen' mode."

Robin picks his head up, looks at her in the mirror, a frown on his lips. "Is that who you see when you look in the mirror?"

Regina laughs, a sadistic sound, "How can I not? Look at me, I'm dressed for the part and everything.." she trails off shaking her head, her gaze dropping.

Now it is Robin's turn to have none of this. He reaches over to a makeshift table (which he notes questionably, appears to be just a meticulously well stacked tower of spellbooks) and dips his hand into the gold chalice filled with water. He lifts Regina's chin with one hand, cupping it tenderly, and runs his sopping fingers over the one side of her face. Massaging at her skin, working the make-up out.

"All I see is Regina, a woman who I've personally seen the good in, I've seen who she really is, what she is capable of, what she has done, what she can do, and I love it all. I want it all, the darkest crevice of her heart, the strongest pulse of her heart beat, the resilience of her heart, the purest part of her heart." He has sufficiently cleaned half of her face off now and he presses a kiss to the tear that slips down her cheek.

"That's who I see when I look at you Regina, because no matter how you dress, or act, or wear your hair. No matter how tightly bound your corsets are or how murderous your grin is, even as the Queen, who let me tell you I saw my fair share of while running from, I will never stop seeing the same woman. Regina.

"A woman who has been broken repeatedly, abused, misused, tossed aside like she was nothing but a prop, and for a time she was, a prop for someone else's gain. A woman who lost love, lost innocence, lost hope. A young girl who held all that was pure and innocent in her heart, but was greeted with only darkness. An innocent who wanted love and happiness, affection, praise, approval and was only rejected."

"A woman who embraced darkness, when she thought all was lost, who held onto anger because she could not find hope. A woman who let it all go for her son, a woman who changed herself to earn love and respect from her friends and family. A woman who I don't want to think has to change anymore to be loved, to be good enough. Because you are, Regina, you are."

"And no matter what costume or facade you try and hide behind or put on, you can never change the one thing that matters and that's your soul," Robin places her hand on her heart, his hand over hers. "And I feel you, I feel your soul, I know who you are and I love you."

Regina bats her eyes, fighting the tears slipping through her lashes and just nods her head, turning to find his lips, her voice cracking as she parts and rests her head in the crook of his neck, hand resting on his cheek. She nudges him with her nose unable to form the three words she wants to say.

Robin holds her in his arms, trailing kisses through her hair which has thoroughly been freed of combs and pins and is a mess on her shoulders. Regina inhales his scent, the familiar forest musk calming and she presses a kiss to the inside of his neck. "Now, I have to take a bath," Regina announces trailing her fingers seductively up his chest. "You can wait for me," she leans in her lips teasing against the skin of his ear. "Or join me."

"There's a bathroom down here to? What is this place?" Robin says in awe of the never ending wonders of the abyssal catacomb. "Apparently I should invest in getting my hands on my own nifty vault."

"You completely ruined the mood," Regina teases, pushing away from him and starting towards the bathroom, shaking her head at him with a with the elusive grin on her face that he sees whenever he closes his eyes, or so he says. Robin catches up to her, clutching her in his arms and growling, "I didn't say I was not going to join you."

Later, feeling fully satisfied and free of the evil queen, Regina redresses into her fashionable pant suit (apparently not her Queen's style). The only other clothes she had down in her vault besides more ball gowns of Enchanted Forest fashion. She links her fingers with Robin, entwining their pinkies and bringing their hands to her lips, pressing a lip to his knuckle, before dragging him out after her.

Regina and Robin part at the edge of the forest. She wants to go in to the city, to get her son and he wants to get his. "I'm going to go hunt down Little John and get my boy."Robin tells her after swooping in and stealing a kiss from her.

She nods, "I'm sure I'll be stuffed into a booth at Granny's with the UnCharmings as per usual post-curse celebration," Regina informs him. "Come by, bring the whole merry men troop gang thing."

"Well if the lady insists," He agrees with a wicked curve of his lips.

Regina smirks, "I think I've displayed that I can be emquite /eminsistent when I want to be."

"Oh, have you ever," Robin agrees and with one more kiss they part ways.

"Snow!" Regina calls out and she cannot conceal the reflexive smile that graces her lips as she picks up her pace, trotting across the street to where her...friend is standing outside of some Storybrooke facility or another. Snow's head turns and her eyes light as she spots the woman coming towards her, tugging at her jacket she starts forward.

"Regina!" Snow greets and the two stand awkwardly in front of each other, the moment leading up to an embrace, but the two never willing to admit they have that level of relationship- the one of them not willing to admit they have that kind of relationship. So they just let it die and stand there smiling at each other until the welcome distraction that is Miss Swan shows up.

Elsa and company flanking her. "Mom, Regina, glad to see you are both..of a different mindset." She hugs her mother nods at Regina and then shifts her hands in her back pocket, furrowing her brows, "Where's Hen-"

"I was just about to ask you the same thing," Regina finishes for her.

"You don't know where he is? What have you been doing all this time?" She demands, voice rising an octave.

"Well excuse me, Miss Swan, unlike you I've been under a curse and forgive me for wanting to rid myself of the effects before greeting my son," Regina answer sharply, crossing her arms defensively across her chest and sucking in a heavy dose of air.

Snow places a hand on Regina's arm and glances warningly at her daughter. "Emma, I'm sure everyone's been busy ridding themselves of the effects of this curse. It's mentally exhausting, we all needed time to recoup before facing the world again. I haven't seen Neal yet or David."

"Speaking of which where is he?" Snow begins.

"Dad? I'll call him," Emma pipes up. Oh sure, all too willing to be helpful for her, Regina thinks bitterly taking in the scenes unfolding around them. Families and friends torn apart by their shattered sight embracing, apologies spilling from their lips as new promises are made. Regina shifts her weighting on her feet as she hears Snow say as calmly as she can.

"No, Emma, where is my baby? Helpless swaddled infant I left in your care?"

Elsa steps forward from behind Anna and Kristoff and presents the bundle, the blue blanket blending in against her dress. Someone should really lend the poor woman contemporary clothes. Regina thinks but then again it took Captain Hand forever to get with the trends, too. Snow accepts her son eagerly into her arms, brushing his head lovingly with her fingers and pressing him into the warmth of her bosom. A whisper from her heart to her baby's,

Mommy's here.

spots him running from the direction of the town line; what was he doing down there? Doesn't matter, Regina decides as relief floods her features and she lunges forward accepting his not-so-tiny form into her arms. Cradling his head against her, squeezing him tightly, playfully before releasing him and pressing a kiss to his forehead.

"Mom," Henry beams. "I told you Emma and Elsa would fix this. I told you it would be okay."

"You did," She ruffles his hair and straightens up, not that it matters he's nearly as tall as her and one day she's sure he'll tower over her. "You told me so, I should listen to you more often."

"Obviously, then you'd be better at video games," He teases poking his tongue at her and she scoffs.

"Kid," Emma says turning to him and squeezing him against her side. "Where've ya been? What were you doing-"

"Grandpa Gold was trying to take me and Belle out of Storybrooke, apparently or something I'm not sure-"

"I'm going to murder that twisted little imp," Regina hisses defensively her nose flaring as anger bubbles within her and she coils her hand into a fist to conceal her magic.

"Mom, it's fine, I'm here," Henry assures her resting his hand on her fisted one and Regina forces a smile on her lips and sighs, letting it go.

"You're right, you are. I'm glad at least one of my protection spells held," She confesses. "Now who's up for some celebratory Granny's?"

"Snow!" David calls out sprinting towards them and taking his wife into his arms, slamming his lips against hers, squishing their son between them. Henry turns away but Regina and Emma shrug, having found what Snow and Charming have for themselves they both no longer are repulsed by the showy signs of affection.

Regina slings her arm around Henry's shoulders, steering him towards Granny's. "Come on, Henry, we'll go get a table at Granny's."

"Why are you so focused on Granny's?" the always lovely Emma asks.

Regina takes a breath and replies looking solely at Henry, "Because it feels like tradition, after we break a curse we go to Granny's. Round of drinks, order of pasta, boom bang."

"Mom," Henry whispers in her ear.

"What?"

He points.

They never make it to Granny's.

"Robin, what are you-" Regina takes a step back. "Marian?"

"Regina, I need your help," Robin says shaking her by the shoulders. His eyes are wild and she knows something must be terribly terribly wrong. What Robin mentioned about feeling her before, his words had been heart felt and kind, loving, but she had not really bought it. Now she does, because she can feel it, the sense of the world shattering, the purpose being over, the rug being ripped from beneath his feet. The loss, but above all the looming fair, because it is as if there is a blade hanging above his neck waiting to drop at the slightest provocation.

"Roland! Marian- curse and-"

"Robin, Robin," She places her hands on his cheeks holding him and forcing him to look at her. "Where's Roland? What's wrong with Roland? Please, Robin, tell me-"

"He's turning to ice, someone has to stop it- Regina please! Please save him!" Robin grabs her and holds her face in his hands, desperate pleading, she feels the shake of his bones with this torturous feeling of helplessness. "Please save my little boy, take y heart, crush it do whatever-"

"No!" Regina shouts and pulls away. "There's another way, crushing your heart won't do anything but hurt people." Regina brings Robin's head down to her shoulders and he starts to sob against her and she can only press her cheek against his shoulder, rubbing her hands in circles on his back. Little John appears holding Roland's shivering form in his arms, tears in the gruff man's eyes; tears in all the Merry Men's eyes. "Marian, what happened?"

Marian does not answer, she's clinging to her son's freezing foot, shaking her head, and tears falling on to his curly head. She keeps her other hand tangled there in the mop of curls and her shoulders heave with sobs. Snow and the others have caught up to the scene by now and there's a buzz immediately. Regina pushes Robin off of her with a quick nudge of her nose against his cheek before she walks over to Marian, as Robin explains the situation as best he can to the others.

Regina stands awkwardly by Marian, running her hands over Roland's tummy, patting it playfully like she used to and it's so cold, she chokes up. She had not intended too but she finds herself choking on sobs, bringing her hands to her face to try and strangle the sounds but she can't console herself. Regina drops her head, whispering his name, resting her forehead against his forehead and his eyes lashes flutter open. His big brown eyes meet hers and the smallest dimpled grin appears on his face.

"Mama, Regina," he says and both women smile. "I'm- I'm-" he shivers and finishes. "Cold."

"Here," Regina sheds her coat without a second thought and wraps it around the boy, engulfing his tiny form in it. "Better?" She asks sniffling, a tear slipping down her cheek. He nods his head. "Good."

A hand is on her shoulder and Regina turns, buries her face in Robin's chest and whimpers, emI know what you have to do/em. Robin pushes her back, burying his fingers into his hair, before planting a kiss on the bridge of her nose and exhaling. "I knew you'd know what to do."

But Regina is shaking her head and just wraps her arm around him, taking a moment to remember his scent, memorize the feel of him against her. Marian spoke up then, her voice low and not dropping her hold on his food. "What do you have to do?"

David steps forward, "Maybe we should take this somewhere private-"

"What. Do. You. Have. To. Do?" Marian hisses interrupting. "I did this to my baby, I want to know how to fix it."

"Marian, you didn't do this," Regina says parting from Robin and walking over to console her but she flinches away. Regina retracts her hand and freezes in her steps. "Ingrid, the Snow Queen, she didn't know how to undo her spell on you because essentially there is no breaking it once it's started. It only results in death, and I haven't studied ice magic enough to know weaknesses but I do know this, she wanted you affected by the shattered sight curse. She wanted you nary and upset so she took her curse on you and just moved it to the closest thing and since you and Roland were together, he was the chosen one."

"Why would she want me unfrozen-"

"To hurt Regina," Robin supplies this answer. "Because Ingrid thought I would choose you after you were thawed but Marian-" he steps towards her.

"Don't," Marian stops him, glaring at him with her puffy red eyes. "I'm losing my son, I don't-"

"Marian, I loved you, but I love her. She's my soul mate, she's my true love. And I don't want to draw this out for you, hurting people is unavoidable here and I've hurt just about everyone. I hope you can find it in your heart to understand, I want you to find your happiness Marian, just like I found mine." He slings his arm around Regina and she leans back into him. "You're not just the woman I once loved Marian, you're my friend and the mother of my child-"

"Robin, Marian's right now is not the time," Regina says turning to face him, standing between him and Marian. She takes Roland into her arms and places him in Marian's arms with a smile, wrapping the shaking mother's hands around her child. "A mother's love is like magic," she says and Marian flashes her a smile; maybe she imagines it but she can almost swear it's real.

Regina pivots facing David and wipes her eyes. "We need to go to the town line."/p

The ominous yellow line of paint stares back at Regina and she has never hated anything more. Get a hold of yourself Regina, /em she barks at herself. Robin and Marian are bickering over Roland, who's sleeping in Marian's arms. The merry men are gathered at the back of the group and the Charmings plus Elsa and company are huddled off to one side, talking and whispering. "Are you ready?" Regina asks unable to lift her lethal stare from the town line.

"What do we do?" Robin asks, wrapping his arms around Marian's around Roland, keepi him warm.

"Regina?" Snow asks.

Her hands are shaking, she fights back tears and shakes with chill because the ice walls may be gone and the Snow queen defeated but winter had come nonetheless. "Roland will freeze to death if you stay here. He will turn to ice. But there is no magic past the town line, you have to leave."

"NO!" Robin roars racing over towards her. "Regina, no, no, no no no no," he holds her stares into her eyes and continues whimpering 'no's because he can see in her eyes that there is no other option. "Regina," his bottom lip quivers and he brings her to him. His lips fiercely meeting hers, fingers diving into her ebony locks, and Regina holds him hard against her. Her nails clawing into his back to keep him against her. She's not sure who pulls away first, neither of them wants to relent on the kiss, neither party wants it to end. Their foreheads are pressed together, breathing each other in, tears staining both their cheeks.

"Here," Regina pulls his green scarf from her pocket and holds it out to him.

"My scarf?" He asks with an eyebrow raise.

"I learned a thing...or two from you...thief," she was trying to playful but she couldn't hold herself together. His hands brush away he tears and she places her fingers over his hands, kissing them tenderly. "It's enchanted so you won't forget who you are once you cross the line. You can't take it off." Regina turns to Marian and holds out a pair of jeans and a blouse, plus a necklace with an arrow on it. "I enchanted the necklace and the clothes are to help you blend in."

"Blend in?" She asks with confusion.

Robin pats her shoulder and explains about how the world is different out there, they believe all of them to be fairy tales, and etc. Marian puts the necklace on and disappears into the woods to change. She returns shortly and Regina pulls out the last thing and she doesn't try to fight the sobs that rake through her as she hands over he purple stuffed monkey. "I didn't know if you would want Roland to remember or not, but he just has to look at the monkey for a few seconds and he'll remember who he is."

"Regina," Robin's voice is pained, cracking and she can feel the turmoil in his soul, the selfish part of him that wants to stay behind and stay with her. Just a tiny sliver that she can feel the rest of him is repulsed at, not because he doesn't want to stay with her but what kind of father would he be if he sacrificed his son for her?

"Now you have to go, all of you," Regina orders keeping her gaze on Marian, wearing blue jeans and a button down plaid long sleeved blouse. "Take him, the magic can't reach him once you're out of town. Warm him up and the curse will fade away, just like the rest of us, and there's one more thing."

"What the bloody hell is it now?" Robin demands, snapping at her and she flinches. "Regina-" he steps towards her but she shakes it off. She knows he's not angry with her, he's angry with the universe.

"You can't ever come back," Regina sucks in a sob and turns away from him. Snow is there and for the first time she let's herself accept the slightest touch of affection from the princess, who places a hand on her back and rubs it in small soothing circles. She takes deep breaths and pulls the potion bottle from her pocket hands it over to him as Marian studies the purple liquid sloshing around inside. "Forget about me and be happy with your family." He starts to shake his head but she won't even let him speak, "If you care anything about me you'll do it. I don't want to send you away to a loveless life, if you both drink it, you'll both forget about me and only me. You can be a happy family, and that's all I want. I just want you to be happy," she smiles but the bittersweet tears pass her lips, salty on her tongue.

Robin closes his hand around the potion and nods before rushing forward and sweeping Regina up into his arms. She starts to sob, not caring that everyone can see her, not caring that Marian is standing right there, because she's losing the man she loves, she's losing her soul mate, her true love, the only chance at happiness she has she's losing and it's bittersweet. Robin let's his fingers tangle in her hair one last time and then slowly he let's the strands fall off and he just stands there, fingers intertwined with hers, staring into her dark brown eyes.

"What are you doing?" She asks pressing him backwards. "Time it's not exactly running out but you don't want to press fate."

"Memorizing you, while I still can, the way your eyes crinkle when you smile, that elusive yet satisfying smile-"

"That you see everytime you close your eyes," she finishes for him with a smile and he nods.

"Everytime I close my eyes."

Regina slides her gold ring off, the one Daniel had given her as an engagement ring, she had enchanted it so that she could see Daniel smiling and she waved her hand in front of it. Now he would be able to see her. She held it up so he could look into it and see the hologram of her. "Now I'll be with you, even if you don't know it." She slid it onto his pinky finger, the only finger it fit, and locked her pinky with his.

"Regina, Daniel gave you that ring," Robin whispers. "You don't want to give it to me-"9

"Daniel, gave it to me as a promise of our love that he would always love me, he wanted me to love again, and a promise that he would always be there for me," Regina said staring up into his blue eyes. "I give that promise to you. I will be waiting right here if you ever think of me, if it's ever safe for you to come back, if you can remember me, if fate wants it to happen. If the book-"

"You're going to find the author, and you are emgoing/em to get the happy ending you deserve, Regina," Robin tells her and he takes off his green jacket and slides it onto her shoulders as she shivers again. "To remember me, but Regina, I'm not Daniel, I'm not strong enough to tell you to love again because I'm selfish and I am madly in love with you, but do whatever it takes to be happy. I want you to be happy and that I can say." Regina presses her lips to his a gentle goodbye kiss, over too soon and she pushes him over the line. Marian hands Roland over to him and then turns to look at everyone, Henry is standing by Regina now, arms wrapped around her. She starts across the line then changes her mind and runs back throwing her arms around Regina's neck, tears staining her face too. Regina is shocked and slowly recovers, wrapping her arms around Marian.

"Thank you, thank you thank you," Marian whispers. "And you're not a monster, Regina, you're a hero."

Regina stands there watching as Marian crosses the line and then all she can do is try and stifle her sobs, the heave of her shoulders giving her away regardless. Robin looks at her pleadingly and he walks back towards her and outstretches his palm. She flattens hers against his and then points to the potion. "Drink it!" she commands because she wants to see him forget get, wants to know he'll be happy.

"Regina I don't have to forget-"

Her eyes plead for her because if she open her mouth she won't be able to stop the sobs, and she doesn't want this to be any harder on him than it has to be. You're making the right decision her eyes tell him. Embrace your happily ever after.

Robin pops the lid off the potion bottle and presses it to her lips, letting him lose himself in her dark enchanting eyes. "When you find the author, point him my way. I'd like to have more than a conversation with him," Robin practically growls and then he takes her hand, drawing it past the town line making it tingle and shake and presses a final kiss to each of her knuckles. "I love you." She nods, blinking away the tears fogging her vision, I love you, too. She knows he knows but she can't bring herself to say the words out loud and seeing how he's about to forget all of this it seems futile.

Robin tips the potion bottle back and takes a swig, half of the bottle just like Regina instructed and then passes the vile to Marian. His mouth twists as the strange tasting potion travels to his stomach and then he blinks his eyes. He states confused at his hand touching hers and retract it, slowly and carefully as if if he moved too fast she might attack him. Which for all he knows, he very well might. Regina only erased the memories of them together so whatever his memories were of the Evil Queen, and she was guessing they weren't fond, was all he knew her as.

The trio starts off down the road, Marian shooting one last pitying glance at all of them before drinking the potion, and following after Robin. They disappear into the forest shortly and once they are out of sight Regina starts to sob audibly.

"Mom!" Henry whines, pained at seeing his mother like this and he wraps his arms around her but she stands rigid, biting at her bottom lip sobbing. He presses his cheek against her just holding her in his arms, letting her know he's here, he's got her.

"Regina," Snow says voice barely above a whisper, handing Neal off to David and stepping closer to her.

Regina shakes her head, stares at Snow with desperate tear stained eyes and beg her in a way that she never would speak with anyone let alone the princess she committed so much of her life trying to defeat. "Pleas spare me the time for hope speech because there is nothing to hope for. He doesn't even know who I am anymore except for my evil, all he knows about me is the person I was not the person I am." She chokes back a sob, breathing heavily as she stares after where they disappeared. "There is no hope for me."

Snow pats her arm soothingly, "You're going to be happy, Regina, if it's the last thing I do you're going to find happiness."

"That doesn't feel possible," Regina seethes.

The Charmings leave enventually, slowly trickle away. First Emma and Elsa, taking them to the pier on a ship home having conjured up some portal or another.

Then David with baby Neal, trying to insist Snow come along but she refuses and so he leaves her the truck and walks back to town. Regina remains, standing and staring at the empty road ahead of her, just like my life she thinks darkly.

Later she insists Snow take Henry home, he doesn't want to leave her and neither does Snow. They want to take her home but she is stubborn and strong willed and simply uses her iron fist to say no. Snow and Henry do leave eventually, it's almost sundown at that time and they're past hungry, the thought of Granny's just a short drive away has them practically running for the truck.

Regina stays standing, the tears have stopped by now and she shivers with chill but the jacket- Robin's jacket is enough for her.

Regina stands until she physically can't, until her bones ache with yearning for relief, her knees shaking, giving in every so often until they collapse beneath her and she plummets to the concrete. The tears start again ad she hits the asphalt, and she folds over, crumpling into a sobbing pile, and why not? No one was here at the edge of town, lingering in the forest, she was completely and totally alone. So why not sob?

She doesn't realize she'd fallen asleep until she's been awoken. emDavid./em The first thing that registers as in her sleepy haze of not yet full consciousness, she feels his arms lifting her off the ground. She mumbles something sleepily in her haze. David shushes her, throwing her arms around his neck and keeping her head from dropping with one hand; holding her as if she was Neal and not a grown woman.

"Where's...Henry..."Regina manages between yawns burrowing agains David's chest a sleep threatens to pull her completely under again.

"He's sleeping in his bed at home, just like you will be," David assures her as he opens the passenger side door.

"No..." she moans sleepily. "I want to stay."

"Regina, he's gone," David whispers as he buckles her into the passenger seat. "He's never coming back, he can't."

"Gone...never...coming back." She repeats before giving into the sweet relief of sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Here's part two of the story! Enjoy guys! There **are **more parts to come + alternate ending to this story so just hang tight. **

Days pass by, the sun rising and setting, not marking anything important, not giving any reason to get up in the morning. Days turn to weeks and then _too_ many weeks.

Regina is watching television, lying in bed, in her constant state of gray numbness she's been living in when a commercial for women's products comes on, and suddenly Regina shoots up in bed. Running her fingers through her hair and covering her eyes because she hadn't been thinking about anything, especially not that and now. _Shit! Shit! Shit!_ She wasn't just a little late she was way extremely no denying it late and thanks to the turmoil of Storybrooke and personal turmoil of late she hadn't even noticed it. _Shit._

"Regina," Snow exclaims a smile spreading on her face as she spots Regina in the drug mart. "So nice to see you out and about," Regina walks aimlessly now, trying to stay ahead of Snow and keep her from seeing what was in her basket."Regina?"

"Not now, Snow," Regina warns testily at the end of the aisle her basket hidden behind the other aisle.

"Please don't shut me out, Regina. We're your family and I think we might help you move on and-"

Regina grabs the box from her basket and holds it up sharply, glaring at Snow. "Some things we can't move on from." Snow's mouth drops and her eyes grow wide, Regina shoves past her before she can say anything more.

"Regina! Regina wait!" Regina is racing out of the drug store, clutching the bag tightly in her fist as she strides toward her car. She throws open the car door and ducks in but Snow is persistent and jumps in the passenger seat.

"Damn you Charmings," Regina curses slamming her fists against the steering wheel. "I should have known you wouldn't give up so easily."

"I was raised by you wasn't I?" She teases poking Regina's side playfully and then her eyes fall on her abdomen and she takes a serious tone. "So...are...you-"

Regina drops her head in her hands and muffles her cry, "I'm so late I'm just flushing money down the drain buying a test and not just going to see Dr. Whale- or someone." she adds as an afterthought because now that she thinks about it she's not sure she wants Dr. Whale's head between her legs.

Snow places her hand on Regina's arms. "Would now be an inappropriate time for a hope speech or..."

Regina laughs and the first smile to grace her face in weeks dances on her lips. "No, by all means give me the speech."

"I'm assuming it's Robin's, I mean I know it's a low chance to get pregnant after one-"

"Oh honey, it was more than once,"

Regina interrupts with a laugh and she sighs. "And yes, it's his."

Snow bobs her head and continues. "Maybe this baby is your way to happiness, I have hope that this baby will bring back to you things you felt long gone and-"

She holds up a hand to stop her, "Okay that's enough before I vomit."

"Because you're pregnant I'm stopping not because I believe that story one bit," Snow teases and both women laugh. Regina opens her mouth to say, _I'm not pregnant yet_ but then stops because if she's not pregnant than she's something far far worse.

Regina paces the living room, thirty minutes is a long ass time when it is a life altering decision. She clutches her cell phone in her left hand, having promised to call Snow and tell her immediately as soon as she knew, pacing the floor when Henry walks in. "You okay Mom?" He asks, an eyebrow quirking up.

Regina smiles at him, and then before she can respond the timer on her phone goes off. She practically jumps, "Have to- pee!" She lies and locks herself in the bathroom. She closes her eyes, taking a deep breath and messages Snow, _it's time. _Regina opens her eyes, holding the test in her hands, and stares down at it. Clear as day, a + stares back up at her. _Pregnant. _She weighs the word, it feels heavy and dry in her mouth, and her shoulders sag at the commitment it entails. She doesn't have to keep it, Regina knows this.

Regina is more than willing to make that decision, her body, her choice, but she feels the sliver of something in her as she studies the way the two lines meet to form the + symbol and her hand drops to cup her abdomen, which has not changed at all. She dials Snow's number and the princess answers before the first ring can finish, she must have literally been waiting right with her phone, Regina thinks.

"So?" Snow asks, and she is fighting the excitement in her voice, trying to tone it down a notch for Regina's sake. Regina opens the bathroom door, pops her head out and checks to make sure Henry's out of hearing distance before replying.

"I'm," she laughs and rests her hand on her forehead, shaking her head in disbelief. "I'm pregnant."

"Oh this is wonderful!" Snow exclaims giddily, managing to control herself and only let out a few high pitched squeals. "What are you going to do? What's going through your head right now?"

"Honestly?"

"Honestly."

"Robin should be here," Regina whispers, the hurt and pain returning slowly as she starts to think about him. Thinking about Robin is like opening floodgates and once you've opened them its not over until the water has successfully drowned you. "He's going to miss everything."

"He's here, I know it, in spirit-"

"Snow, he's not _dead_! He's just gone to me forever!" Regina corrects her. "Our child is never going to know his or her father, never know his or her brother Roland, never know how great of a man Robin truly was. He or she won't get any of it," She whimpers. "I don't think I can be a single mother again, especially not to this baby, it's not fair."

"To who?"

"The baby," She states. "Children need parents who are there, present with them and I'm barely here for Henry I am so-" she shakes her head. "I don't know if I can do this."

"Regina, whatever you decide you're not alone and I think you would make an _excellent_ mother, because I've watched you with Henry and you are with him and you could be with this baby. But it's your decision, it's up to you/"

"Goodbye Snow."

"Goodbye Regina."

Regina pockets her phone and lets out the breath she did not realize she had been holding before abandoning the bathroom and traveling to the kitchen to make dinner for Henry and herself.

_Technology is magic_, Regina thinks as she studies the black and white print out of her baby. She's nearly two months pregnant by this time and her little baby is perfect to her. A perfect little head and a round belly, not exactly legs but a tail like thing that she knows will become legs and little buds for arms. She is still beaming at the picture like a proud Momma when she knocks on Snow's door.

"Hell- oh, Regina! Hey, come in," David greets stepping out of the doorway and motioning for her to come in. She enters with a nod and a smile and stands at the foot of the stairs about to yell up for Snow when David speaks again. "Snow told me about you're uh-"

Her face drops and she snaps her head in his direction, "She what? Who else did she tell-"

David holds his hands up as if to say 'don't shoot' and backs away. "Only me, her husband, and come on, it's Snow." Regina laughs at this and shakes her head. "You seem like you're okay with everything and-"

"That's because you don't hear me crying at night or in the shower," She informs him and he quiets. She realizes she may have been too harsh and adds, "But I'm slowly coming to terms yes. And maybe Snow's hope thing is getting to my head."

"She can be very persuasive...and persistent," He jokes, crossing his arms as Snow enters the room, a cheery smile on her face.

"Who can?" She pipes up innocently as she greets Regina.

"You, my dear," David replies before leaning in to steal a kiss the way- Regina let's out a shaky breath and looks away. _Don't go there, Regina._. David leaves them then and Snow takes Regina's hands into hers.

"News? Or is there another pleasure to which I owe?" She says leading them to the kitchen table and taking a seat.

Regina sets the sonogram picture down on the table and slides it towards the princess. "I decided to have the baby."

Snow picks up the sonogram and a smile widens so wide her whole face crinkles up. "Regina, that's w-"

"Wonderful wonderful, I know, I just thought you should know," Regina confessed. "because you're my- my-" Snow stares up at her expectantly and she sighs. "My _friend_."

_Robin takes Marian and they wander into the woods. His head is killing him, images of a beautiful woman with ebony hair, loving her, ravishing her, cherishing her and then images of doing the same to his wife Marian have him perplexed. In a quick moment of relapse he remembers her briefly but it's enough, he doesn't want to forget her, he can't forget her, and his fingers shove down the back of his throat until he's bent in half throwing up whatever wasn't already absorbed of the potion. It still takes effect but he tried. He tried. _

"Snow!" Regina cries into the phone, sitting up in her bed, hands precariously placed on her swollen stomach.

"Regina?" Snow murmurs sleepily on the other end of the line. It's 3am and Regina has been feeling this weird pressure in her pelvis and her back and abdomen ache, but now it's to the point of pain and she can't sleep through it.

"I don't know what's going on," Regina whispers the fear in her voice revealed despite her best efforts. "I don't know, what's happening-"

"Deep breaths, Regina, deep breaths, stress isn't good for the baby," Snow is wide awake now. "It's probably contractions and nothing to worry about until-"

"Ah!" Regina yelps as she feels a wetness between her thighs and she tries to control her breathing. Deep breath in, and out, in and out. "I.." breath "think.." breath "my... water...just...broke."

"Wake up Henry, I'm on my way," and with that Snow hangs up.

"Henry! Henry!" Regina yells from the bed as she tries to swing her legs over the edge of the bed. He runs in, hair a tousled mess. Comes to her side at once and helps her to her feet, grabs her hospital slippers that had been resting on her hospital bag waiting for just this moment.

"I've got the bag, you have slippers, car seat in car, check, check, check," He says running over the list in his head as they wobble out of the bedroom. They reach the stairs and he goes in front of her, extremely cautiously and slowly taking each step one at a time until they safely reach the level ground of the first floor. "Stairs, check."

Regina smiles at her young son and leans over, presses a tender kiss to his forehead as Snow shows up at their front door. "I love you."

"I know, Mom, and I love you too! Now go have my baby sister and come home safe and sound!" Henry teases as he hands her off to Snow, along with the bags and gives the pair a proper 3am send off.

_Robin jolts awake, his heart is racing, palms sweaty. Something's not right, something's happening but he does not know what. Marian rolls over in bed next to him, grabs his arm and mumbles something incoherently in her sleep. Something about going back to bed or relax dear. But Robin can't relax and he gets up maybe some water will calm his systems. He pads off to the kitchen in their small apartment that they can just barely afford with his meager salary as a Park Ranger at the state park. It was nothing like his life of thievery with the Merry Men but he knew he had to stay away from them, stay away from Storybrooke. His boy's life literally depended on it, Snow had made that crystal clear when she sent them off. _

Robin pours himself a glass of water and takes a seat at their small round table. He sips slowly at the water, his heart right slowing down and he stares at the gold ring on his pinky. He's had it ever since he can remember and he's taken to twisting and toying with it whenever the turmoil hits, when his gut wrenches with panic, and the mere touch of his skin against the gold has an image flashing again in his mind. It's quick, over far too soon. The same woman, the woman who he just can't seem to fit into this puzzle piece. The woman who resembled the evil queen from his memories in the enchanted forest but simply couldn't be and he focuses in the short glimpse of the woman he sees.

She's smiling at him, they're sitting on a log and he's stolen something of hers, a...a...letter. She looks beautiful and broken at the same time and he wants to take her into his arms and- No! Robin you're married! _He scolds himself blinking his eyes but he can't get her to leave him. The way her brown eyes sparkle like an exquisite gem when she smiles, that elusive but satisfying smile, and he thinks she is simply stunning in every way. _

"Robin?" Marian's voice breaks his concentration and he looks up to see her standing in the doorway of the kitchen, his t-shirt hanging loosely off of her small form. She squints her eyes and yawns, watching him. "Are you coming back to bed?" She asks as she shuffles over and takes a seat on his lap, resting her head against his.

"Yea, I just needed to...clear my head," Robin states, and Marian places sleepy kisses along his jawline and then the kisses reach his lips, her fingers curling around the back of his neck, and as they kiss Marian morphs into the woman, who's name he wish he knew. He's kissing her, they're in the woods and his one arm wraps around her shoulders, the other getting lost in her hair, going back and forth. A never ending kiss of fiery passion and trust and love, when Marian pulls away gasping for breath, he feels like an adulterer.

"Wow," Marian gasps and for a moment he's worried she saw right through him, saw into his mind but then she continues. "I can't remember the last time you kissed me like that." Robin's glad that with the lights off and the sun far from rising that a sort of darkness has set into their apartment, because he's surely gone red with guilt because he wasn't kissing Marian. (Well technically he was, but not emotionally.) Marian's hands linger on his neck and then move lower, lower, and lower still, her eyes fluttering seductively as she kisses him once more. "Come back to bed with me." And he does, partly to clear his conscience which is feeling rather guilty and partly because he needs to remember his feelings for his wife that this fantasy woman is overriding.


End file.
